5 stages of acceptance of the inevitable. Psychology of a person after a stroke of life

American psychologist on the basis of personal research has developed a theory of "5 stages of adoption of the inevitable." Elizabeth Kubler-Ross described it in the book "On Death and Dying" (1969). Initially, this theory dealt with the topic of leaving close people and was a separation of the state of the grieving man for periods.

The effectiveness of the concept entailed the transformation of its original purpose, depending on various complex life situations. They can be the following: divorce, illness, trauma, material damage, etc.

The first stage, characterized by negation

If a person finds out about his illness or a serious illness of people close to him, then the state of shock follows. Information is heavy and unexpected, so there is a denial. A person believes that this could not happen with him, refuses to believe in his involvement. He tries to isolate himself from the situation, pretend that everything is normal, and also closes in himself, refuses to talk about the problem. These are signs of the first stage of the 5 stages of adoption of the inevitable.

Such behavior may be conscious or not, but it is caused by a lack of faith in the tragedy that has occurred. Man is engaged in the maximum suppression of his experiences and emotions. And when it is no longer possible to restrain them, he enters the next stage of grief.

The second stage: rage

A person is angry that his fate is cruel and unfair: he can be angry with himself, with the people around him and with the situation in the abstract view. It is very important to treat him with gentleness and patience, because grief is the cause of this behavior. This is the second stage of the 5 stages of adoption of the inevitable.

Human psychology consists of a gradual awareness and perception of the situation, which is accompanied by wear of disguise and the repetition of pain. He does not feel that he is ready for what happened, therefore he becomes furious: he is angry with other people, with objects around him, family members, friends, God, his studies. In fact, the victim of the circumstances has an understanding of the innocence of others, but it is impossible to reconcile with this. Grief is a purely personal process and each takes place individually.

The third stage

For this period, stay in a naive and desperate hope that all troubles will disappear, and life will once again become the same. If the experiences are related to the breaking of the relationship, staying at this stage is reduced to trying to negotiate with the former partner, to pleas for the last chance or friendship.

A person carries out helpless attempts to bring the situation under control. It boils down to the phrase "if we ...":

- ... came to another specialist;

"... did not go there;

"... did it;

- ... took the advice of a friend, etc.

Noteworthy is the desire to conclude a deal with higher powers, as well as to promise and repent in the name of extending the inevitable. A person can start looking for some signs of fate, believing in signs. For example, if you make a wish, open any page of the book, and without looking to indicate an arbitrary word that proves to be affirmative, the troubles will go away on their own.

Depression - the fourth stage

A person is in a state of utter hopelessness, since he already understands the senselessness of the efforts spent to change the situation. His hands fall, life loses its meaning, all expectations turn into disappointments.

In case of loss, depression manifests itself in two ways:

1. Regret and sadness that arise with respect to mourning. This period is easier to sustain if there is a person close to him who can support.
2. Prepare to let go of the event, which is an exclusively individual process. This period can be stretched for a very long time and provoke problems with health and with others.

This is the fourth stage of the 5 stages of acceptance of the inevitable.

Adopting an event

At the final stage, a person is able to experience relief. He admits that grief has happened in his life, he agrees to accept this and continue his journey. For each peculiar experience of these stages is peculiar, and it happens that the stages are not in the specified sequence. Some period can take only half an hour, completely disappear or be worked out for a very long time. Such things happen purely individually.

Acceptance is the final stage, the end of torment and suffering. Suddenness greatly complicates the realization of grief afterwards. Often there is such a situation that there is no strength to accept the situation. At the same time, there is no need to show courage, because as a result one must submit to fate and circumstances, to let things through and to find peace. Not every person is able to go through all five stages of making the inevitable.

The fifth stage is very personal and special, because no one can save a person from suffering except himself. Other people can support in a difficult period, but they do not understand the full extent of other people's feelings and emotions.

5 stages of acceptance of the inevitable are purely personal experiences and experiences, which transforms the person: breaks it, leaves it forever in one of the stages or makes it stronger. Do not run and hide from grief, you need to realize it. It is recommended to imagine how it flows through the body. The result is the removal of the lock, the acceleration of the transition to the last level and the process of healing. These five stages of making the inevitable are designed to show people experiencing life's hardships what is happening to them.