We build a happy life. How to forget the past

There is a saying: "After a fight with their fists they do not wave." But how sometimes you want to replay the past, leave with yourself offensive words expressed in the heat of anger, return early departed loved ones, do not commit rash acts. Sometimes it seems that it is impossible to forget the past. It hurts, disturbs, poisons existence, brings unbearable pain.

But it is impossible to live in the past. No matter how painful it may be, the past is left behind, it can not be corrected. We must live on. But how to do that? How to forget the past, bringing so much pain?

There are two solutions to the problem. The first is the simplest. You can continue to remember that it was past, cherish your sorrow, daily experience the pain of resentment or loss, gradually poisoning life not only for yourself but for others.

The second solution is more complex, but productive. We must let go of all that has sunk into oblivion. Remember, as in the song: "And forgive him, forgive and let go." The past will pass anyway. Emotions are smoothed, the grief will subside. But in order to permanently get rid of negative memories, you need to force yourself not to think about them. It is to force. After all, because you will experience the care of a loved one on a daily basis, he will not return, and life will not be the same as it was before.

Imagine that in front of you there is a wall on which photographs from the past life hang. They are bright, distinct, colored. And only one of them is faded, black and white. Look closely at her. Yes, she is unpleasant, she cures wounds. But around there are so many bright and vivid pictures. Mentally move the photo to the furthest corner. Tell yourself: "Life goes on." And then try to mentally hang on the wall bright colored photos from the future life.

Do yourself a new business. It does not matter what it will be: communicating with new friends, singing in a choir, raising grandchildren or embodying a new business idea. If there is a case that you can devote yourself with pleasure, the question of how to forget the past will go to the background, and from the very past, with time, only pleasant, perhaps slightly sad, but no longer injuring memories. Only to this you need to make an effort, you need to love yourself.

How to forget the past? About this written hundreds of psychological books. But they all boil down to one thing: to do this, you need to work hard. If you refuse to work on yourself, prefer self-destruction to creation, then the future simply will not be.

Therefore, before you answer your question about how to forget the past, choose the appropriate methodology and start acting, think carefully what is more important. What will you choose - constant self-flagellation and eternal tears or a happy future, in which you will not repeat many mistakes, you will be able to succeed, to continue living? It depends only on you. If you decide to continue life, then do not feel sorry for yourself, and everything will turn out.

There is another question that worries many. How to forget offense? What if the faithful, seemingly, humiliated, insulted or simply betrayed?

First, try to understand the cause of the offense. Suddenly, you just exaggerated greatly? No? Then try to understand why you were offended. Maybe you yourself provoked such an attitude? Or maybe a person just wanted to make you see something that you do not notice, but did it not very skillfully? And suddenly, just so unfortunate circumstances?

Now think, why, in fact, you do not want to forgive? Perhaps it is profitable for you. Many try to raise their own self-esteem, not forgiving a repentant person. On the wrong can be attributed their own failures or miscalculations. Be honest with yourself. As soon as you realize the cause of your deep resentment, you will immediately feel better.

Try to reset the negative. There are many ways. You can tackle the old dishes, start going to the gym or join an oriental martial arts club. Just do not break on other people not related to the conflict.

Finally, the most important. Learn to forgive and love yourself. Be able to stop in time, stop grieving about what has passed. After all, in life everything ends sooner or later, and people who have not made mistakes do not happen.

Work on yourself and be happy.