How do adequate people behave?

Do we love eccentrics, those who constantly attract attention by strange and incomprehensible actions? Hardly, rather, they are amused, they are considered funny and even afraid. Adequate people, unlike those who constantly drop out of the norms and standards of communication, are much more pleasant and reliable.

The word itself is of Latin origin. Adaequare - "equate, identify." Consequently, adequate people are those whose Behavior and way of expressing thoughts and feelings are acceptable, consistent with the situation, circumstances, environment. But this concept should not be confused with conformism, opportunism, and grayness. Ability to foresee the reaction of the interlocutor, to comply with generally accepted norms, to restrain the undesirable manifestations of emotions for a given situation is the result not only of good upbringing. It is also an indicator of intelligence and spiritual development. Why are we afraid of the insane? Because we do not know what to expect from them. Adequate people, by contrast, are fairly predictable, and this does not mean that they are boring. In many situations (especially in business communication), when we expect to receive a certain reaction to our words and actions, eccentricities are unacceptable. Imagine what you would experience if the saleswoman in the store, in response to your request, weigh 300 g of sausage or show a blouse 44 size, suddenly began to undress or grabbed her head with weeping? Surely you would not be at ease.

Of course, history knows many examples of vivid, extraordinary actions. Let us recall Khrushchev's famous shoe. And it is not always necessary to say only what is expected of us. It's not about the essence, but about the form. Adequate people observe the convention, the style of communication accepted for this situation in this society. However, since the etiquette of different countries and nations differs not only by conventions, but also by the limits of the permissible, it is worth paying special attention to this if we have a business or personal meeting with representatives of other nations.

Often, what is obvious for us and does not require additional comments for our foreign guests or interlocutors may seem strange or even offensive. For example, it is natural for Russians to visit each other without warning, just "drop by a glass of tea." But the German in this situation will not understand you and will even be indignant at your impudence. There it is customary to warn and agree in advance about the visit. There are many such examples, but not now the national etiquette is occupied by us.

Although the mentality has a very significant effect on all spheres of human life. Take, for example, such a concept as adequate self-esteem, that is, not overestimated and not understated, corresponding to reality. But even here the very differences creep in. If modesty is considered a virtue for a Russian or an Asian, then, say, an American or a Spaniard does not hesitate in the most favorable light to present all his achievements, embellishing them and once again stressing. Much depends on education, on the model of behavior adopted in the family. But all this is influenced also by the established system of values.

And it is they who determine whether adequate relations will develop in two people. Will participants in the group meet their roles, mutual expectations, norms, also depends on many factors. One thing remains certain: that the standards are respected, they must be clear and obvious.