Learning to Love

To love a person, to find that one, to create a family once and for all. A real family where love lives. How to achieve family happiness, what are the secrets of achieving it?

Each of us has his own character, his own notions of tastes, absolutely different needs and demands. But there is something in life that everyone can not do without. This is love. Everybody wants to love . But how to understand this beautiful property of the human soul?

I did not manage to meet one and for life. I married him, the children were born, but we did not learn how to love. The question arises: how did we get married? Without love? Yes, I believe, without love. Having passed and having received my little experience, I can say that it is impossible to build a family for love! I can not say that I did not like my future husband. Yes, I liked him, but no more. It was a passion, but not love. First of all, I wanted him to be mine. Ordinary sense of selfishness. I wanted how I want a beautiful car, a beautiful decoration. I fell in love with his beautiful eyes, gaiety of character, sociability, somewhere perseverance.

Our feelings burned, burned and flared up in a huge fire. It was wonderful and wonderful for the time being. But when I gave birth, my appearance changed, my inner world changed , and my husband, accordingly, fell in love with me to the one I was before pregnancy: a beautiful, harmonious, cheerful, carefree young girl. But time makes its own adjustments. Time passed, life went on. Every day I realized that passion and love are losing, but nothing new appears. Rather say good and light did not appear. On the contrary, we became irritable towards each other, inattentive, uninteresting to each other; People who do not care about the life of another, seemingly close person. Our family had no continuation. Living in one territory, everyone lived their own lives. And after a few years, I came to the conclusion that love does not come just like that. This wonderful feeling needs to be learned. And learn more than one year. Love needs to be nurtured, cherished, nourished. Passion, falling in love. And in a family where the husband and wife do not try and do not try to get on with each other through "small" self-sacrifices, they do not get rid of the sharp corners of their character, they touch each other with their jerks, then the family collapses like a sand castle that could not Become an indestructible fortress.

After all, love is eternity, because when we marry, we create a family for life. And not only terrestrial, but also in heaven. Love is not selfish, because we love for nothing, but simply. Because he's your husband - good or bad, stubborn or flexible, smart or not, high or low - but what's the difference! When you love, appearance does not matter. This is love - not to notice the shortcomings. How do we love our children, how do we love our parents? Simply, because they are ours.

Love is a sacrifice that can consist of small things, and our life consists of them. Instead of watching football, the husband will go and work with children. This is already self-sacrifice for the sake of the family, for the sake of the loved ones. To be able to give up one's interests, be able not to be angry, not to be irritated, not to blame, but just to love.

I, unfortunately, have not learned in the first marriage of love, although I tried. Now to look for the culprit that love was not born, I think, there is no sense. As the hero said in one feature film: "If something goes wrong in the family, both are to blame - both husband and wife."

And yet I want to learn how to love. Let the first time did not work out. To learn to love, you need to change something in yourself. Or to meet someone who will help you with this. The main thing is not to rush anywhere, love does not tolerate haste, fuss, bombast, ostentatious. There is one law of spiritual life: the magnitude of the experience, the inner energy of the senses in no way depends on the strength of their external manifestation. The turbulence of feelings, the boiling of emotions do not yet tell about their depth. The real feeling basically looks modest, quiet, inconspicuous.

I think I met such a person, although I will not go ahead. I just feel that I'm changing, my feelings change in a good way, in the direction that is called - Love.