Self improvementPsychology

How to forgive offenses easily?

Many people for years accumulate pain and disappointment. They do not know how to live. It is already difficult for them to believe in human honesty and decency. But this life is deprived of joy. And there is no better means of bitterness than to learn how to forgive offenses.

When you wake up, you will be full of energy and enthusiasm. Nothing will pull you down and make you experience negative emotions. Forget about bitterness, disappointment and pain - breathe deeply!

How to forgive offenses? Avoid two mistakes

Many try to forget, but do not forgive offense. They are trying to force their pain into distant corners of consciousness. And they pretend that nothing happened. But this leads to the fact that unpleasant events in their lives are constantly repeated.

Another erroneous opinion is the opposite. Some people think that forgiving means forgetting. But if you erase some event from memory, it will certainly happen again. As a result, such people prefer to draw conclusions and look to the future, based on past experience. But remember that this position takes a lot of energy. A lot of effort is spent on maintaining a state of resentment. And it is better to direct them to creative processes.

How to forgive offenses?

Learn to do it right. So that you do not drown in your painful past, but also do not let yourself be used. How to forgive an offense right? Imagine that there is a sacred place in your mind in which all your valuable experience accumulates, which you have learned from the events that have happened to you. Just be aware of what you want: remember the feelings of resentment or the lesson that you got?

Of course, the second. The first option is closely related to strong negative emotions. They are torturing you. Therefore, the secret of how to forgive offenses is simple - release all negative emotions, save all useful information. Do not forget about the situation at all. Share your feelings and conclusions.

Solve the problem

If you have such an opportunity, talk to the person who offended you. Try to understand the situation, and not get bogged down in mutual reproaches. Agree that everyone will calmly express their point of view, explain the reasons for their behavior. In this case, the listener does not have to interrupt the speaker.

Below is described a fairly effective scheme of conversation. The first stage is the expression of negative emotions. It is known that old unspoken grievances can be kept for years, cause new conflicts without a reason. Therefore, it is important to state your claims. A person in colors can describe events that have upset or enraged him, but he should not reproach and call his opponent.

Now, when the speaker expressed his displeasure, he calmed down and was ready for a rational dialogue. The second stage is to describe your true emotions at this moment. What was offensive to him? What was he afraid of?

The third stage is the realization that all parties are always to blame for the conflict. The speaker must acknowledge his part of the guilt. For example, apologize for incontinence.

The fourth stage is the solution of the problem. Make your suggestions.

Now swap roles. When both participants express themselves, discuss the options for resolving the conflict and forgive each other.

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