What to Choose: A Vacation By Taking Care of a Child Or Career?

Preparation for motherhood for a woman is always associated with various problematic issues for which she and her husband want to find the right answer. Professional career of a woman is one of such problems. Today, most women have full-time professional employment, and often have to work without days off and leave. The number one problem is a childcare leave.

The situation is further complicated by the fact that not all employers wish to provide a future maternity leave. The maximum, which they agree to grant leave on pregnancy and childbirth.

What to choose a woman: leave to care for a child or career?

Here it will be appropriate to advise a woman to ask herself one more question: "Who needs my child?" The answer is obvious. A woman gives birth to children only for herself. Other motives, as a rule, are not long-term and do not justify themselves (for example, the desire to keep a beloved man).

To make the right choice for the next three years, you need to weigh the pros and cons of the leave to care for the child.

A small retreat into the age psychology, I think, will help many future mothers. It will be about the most difficult period in the life of the child - newborns and infancy. In the first year of life the foundation of the child's character is laid. The way your baby will feel psychologically comfortable will affect the formation of a mentally healthy person.

For an infant, emotional communication with the mother is the main activity. Through the establishment of contact with the mother, the child learns the world: can he be trusted? Only the mother can give the child confidence in the development of space, in communicating with other people.

In addition to emotional intimacy, Mom in the first three years of life, creates the necessary patterns of behavior, forms self-service skills, monitors health. The more time mom spends with a baby, the healthier the child is. This is confirmed by numerous life examples.

Let's remember our great-grandmothers who breast-fed for a long time. The benefit is not only in breast milk, but also in a close relationship with the mother. Modern children very often are on artificial feeding and are brought up by nannies. Because for my mother - work is more important. Mom wants the child to have a lot of toys, beautiful clothes, and the kid - to be with mom.

I have often seen how children from a dysfunctional family tend to go home to their mother. At home, dirt, lice, a string of drunks, and the baby is rushing to her mother. Mom is the main value for the child. It's us, adults, gradually learn to appreciate it quite different - things and money.

A small child is waiting for her mother from work. And my mother, tormented by clients, documents, delayed until late at night, crossing the threshold of the house, is not able to already be affectionate, play, read, and atone for the baby.

In recent years, child psychologists have increasingly referred to "the breakdown of maternal attachment" as a cause of increased anxiety in children, neuroses, self-doubt.

So, on one side of the scale - an application for a leave to take care of a child, on the other - a career.

The child will be with you all his life. And your employer, for whom you are so clinging, can, for example, go bankrupt six months later. Life is long, everything happens.

Sometimes we just think the impending catastrophe in our career. In fact, nothing terrible can and do not happen. Works around a lot, and a good specialist will always be in demand.

Once I heard the words of a mother who lost her drug addict's son, I remembered them forever: "I've worked all my life, I've made a career, but I had to keep my son with me like a medal around my neck."

A wise woman will intelligently dispose of the opportunity to be with a child in the first years of life. She will make the right choice before giving up parental leave.