In the post can I have sex? Spousal intimacy during fasting

In the post can I have sex? This question is of concern to many families, especially young ones, and those who have recently enforced church laws. Most believers, of course, will respond negatively. Families in which the foundations of Orthodox Christianity are observed for several generations, adhere to unequivocal opinion on this issue. And yet not everything here is so unambiguous ...

What do people think?

If you conduct a survey among modern people on the topic "Can sex in the post? " , Opinions will be very different. Someone will say that you can not categorically. Other Believe that it is possible, but only married couples. Someone thinks that it is enough and registration of relations in the registry office. And some will impose a ban only on free love, which in general in Orthodoxy is considered a terrible sin. Nevertheless, many people are afraid of having sex during fasting. Where does the roots of these beliefs grow from and what are they caused by?

The essence of fasting in Orthodoxy

So, one of the main questions that believers ask in the post: "Is it possible to have sex?" Every canon in any religion is not taken from the ceiling. Sense and purpose are necessarily present in everything. In Orthodox Christianity, fasting means a time when you need to cleanse your soul of sinful thoughts, giving yourself up to the most ascetic way of life. Excludes any fatty foods: meat, fish, etc. Alcohol, cigarettes are also banned. Well, of course, carnal relations. It is believed that by abandoning all this, a person makes a sacrifice to God, thinks about the eternal, makes his being more spiritual. And physical needs, on the contrary, put it on one level with animals that do not have a soul, but who are also doomed to eternal life. Only the eternity of such soulless beings is prepared in the form of hell.

The Bible says that the satiety of many people led to death, but abstinence does not threaten anything bad. Moreover, it raises a person above the physical world, makes him stronger, brings him closer to God. Accordingly, if you are wondering in the post, whether it is possible to have sex, the answer from this point of view is one: you can not. Let's take a deeper look at this situation.

Parting words of the saints

In general, if we talk about whether one can have sex in fasting or not, then it is worth turning to the original source, namely, to the covenants of the apostle Paul. He urged the spouses not to shy away from physical intimacy with each other and make exceptions except for fasting and prayer. But! By mutual agreement. And then again be together, not to give reason to Satan to the temptation.

In other words, the saint gave the good of conjugal love, but considered casual connections as the intrigues of Satan. And so that there was no desire to surrender to them, he called on the spouses to prudence to abstain, so that it was really for the benefit of the soul, and not for harm. That is, he did not set any rigid limits. From this we can conclude that you can have sex in the post, but only if one of the spouses can not abstain for a long time. For example, if a husband really wants, then the wife should not refuse him, so that he is not tempted and sinned on the side.

The apostle Paul was also echoed by other saints. So, for example, St. Dionysius of Alexandria, who lived in the fourth century AD, said that people who married were themselves judges and should independently determine the necessity and duration of abstinence. But Timothy of Alexandria, in general supporting St. Paul, added that it would be nice for spouses to stick to a sexual fast on weekends - on Saturday and Sunday. Because these are the days when liturgies are held in churches. Here we can conclude that if it is very difficult, sex in the post is possible, but it is necessary to restrain oneself at least in the days of liturgies and holy holidays. And the Orthodox world does not know other canonical covenants from the saints.

Twitching

Of course, all believers try to observe the religious canons in fasting. "Can I have sex at this time?" - they are interested. Religion is too dependent on man. Unfortunately, people are not always preached by highly spiritual people, with pure thoughts ... And even more often fanatics dress in a mantle. And they all turn it upside down. In collections published, in particular, by Russian religious figures, it appears that in the post you can not have sex categorically. And on ordinary days the ban on marital intimacy was imposed, according to them, on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. Plus a liturgical weekend. In total, it turned out that sex was reserved for parishioners only twice a week. Although the church canons did not require this at all ...

In addition, the priests often abuse their power, rudely interfere in the personal life of the parishioners. In the history of Russian Orthodoxy there were cases when the clergy arranged a real shadowing of the flock, wishing to establish whether people adhere to restrictions in the intimate life or not.

There are such priests today. Listening to the confessions of the parishioners, they sharply condemn the "warmed up" ones, give instructions, attribute to the spouses a strict punishment in the form of abstinence. Thus, at times, bringing discord to families and even destroying them.

About such inordinately zealous servants more than once spoke the higher clergy during the cathedrals. It indicated to the priests that it is unacceptable to coerce or induce parishioners to chastity contrary to their will. And recommended to observe in the conversation about family life special care. But from time to time fanatics are found everywhere.

Opinions of priests

Of course, if you ask a strict priest: "Is it possible to have sex in fasting?" - then, most likely, he will answer negatively. Just a reasonable church minister, unlike a fanatic, will not insist on this too much. His answer will be approximately this: "It is undesirable, but if your flesh is weak, then you can, but try to abstain as much as you can bear." People in this century are weak in their passions. The Holy Fathers will not impose very strict prohibitions on them, so that people do not turn their backs on the church and follow the canons as much as they can.

According to the priest of the Savvino-Storozhevsky Monastery, it is strictly forbidden to perform marital duties during the Great Lent . After all, Jesus calls these days to fight with passions and bad habits, get rid of sinful thoughts and deeds. If such behavior is given hard, then you should turn to confession and repentance, which give strength and strength. The main thing is not to allow relaxation and not to succumb to temptations, supporting yourself with prayer.

Archbishop Elijah - Novgorod ruler - said that it is especially important to abstain in the Easter week, as well as Passion and Fedorov (the first). By the way, even the most tolerant clergymen recommend that spouses exclude sexual intimacy even during Holy Week, if one does not manage to restrain throughout the entire post.

Verdict of physicians and psychologists

And what do people who are far from religion say about abstinence? What is the position of science in this matter? The physicians of the soul and body, that is, psychologists and physicians, naturally do not impose a ban on sex during fasting. But there is nothing harmful in abstinence, if it does not take too long. In their opinion, there is even some benefit in this, because after a certain break the sexual sensations become aggravated and bring much more pleasure to the spouses.

And how do the others?

How many religions, so many opinions. Each has its own dogmas, prohibitions and restrictions. One of the most strict is Islam. So, it must be said that Muslims in this matter are not very categorical. Islam does not forbid sexual life during Ramazan (practically the same as for Orthodox fasting). But! Permission extends only to patients, nomads and people temporarily settled in a foreign land. They can have sex during fasting, and everyone else will have to wait.

Orthodox exceptions

But Orthodoxy - especially modern - is not such an animal. There are cases when the spouses met after a long separation, and their meeting fell just on the post. For example, a serviceman came home for a week, or the sailor returned from a long voyage, and a month later he again on the road. It would be cruel to demand from them abstinence and, according to the teachings of St. Paul, even sinful. Especially if there is a new separation in front. In such cases, the Orthodox Church turns a blind eye to dogma and gives kindness to physical love.

An Important Moment - Mutuality

It happens that in the family one of the spouses is churched, and the other is not. Or just someone stronger in spirit, and someone - weaker. And then, while the first furiously fasts (including sexually), the second makes up the deficit on the side. From the point of view of the Orthodox Church, this situation is even more sinful than carnal relations between spouses during fasting. And if you are not sure about your partner, you doubt his fortress, it's better not to practice abstinence at all, but to go to "hunger" gradually: through conversations, prayers and confessions.

The personal confessor will answer

So you can or can not have sex while fasting? Certain conclusions will make this article. But in the world there is not and can not be anything single-valued, categorical. A man must be flexible, listen to his soul ...

And every family is a very individual case. And the circumstances are different. Therefore, the wisest apostle Paul said that abstinence should be by mutual consent of the spouses.

If the two can not come to a decision, the priest will help. Just do not address on such an intimate question to the foreign priest. You can trust the confessor, who leads the family for a long time, knows about the problems and circumstances of the life of the spouses and will be able to suggest a reasonable answer, true for this particular case. Or rather, not even an answer, but advice. Who will keep the love of the couple, and deliver him from sin.